Hey, I’m amazing, right?
Even if I chase you, you won’t come
Tears fill up my eyes, and I can’t run anymore

Maybe it’s jealousy… I’m s-a-d…!!

At midnight, I rushed out
I kicked the door,
my glass slipper broke,
and I also tore my dress

that was the song that was constantly playing, in my head. why, why, why?! sometimes this mask of smile won’t go away, even when im nearing the edge. It’s not enough to be gorgeous to be happy.

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we arrived at island cove at around umm, lunchtime? anyways, what was supposed to be a good event rather turned out to be a night full of false expectations, masquerade, role-play and pretention.

blame it on the weather, maybe. we were indoors most of time. Most of the time we were inside the hall and talking about the future of our company. OKAY and we were rather thinking of ways to escape practice of our Lion King presentation and thank God we won.

we were there like we weren’t. even loneliness exist in paradise.

————————————————————

and maybe you can blame it on Mark! oh my gawd, here we go again. Lately he’s been stealing my life from me - all i can do is think fo him, especially when we were at the resort. seeing him with other people hurts me alot, why am i thinking of him, why do i feel jelousy? we’re not even that close…maybe not enough, or maybe too much, im very confused! i don’t want to breakdown and i don’t give a damn to what i feel coz i know its going nowhere…i can’t do self-medication for this heavy, burdened feeling..something between obsession and pride, a feeling between desperation and hopelessness. No, i don’t want to blame him, its just that i can’t convince myself to belive i have fallen in love. deep trouble.

i want to put an end to this, how can i stop a feeling that’s slowly eating me away? I want to wake up from him.

I want to gather up the stardust
and throw them at you
Why do you care?
You can’t love anyone but yourself…